I can hear the voices down the hall
I can hear the noises in the wall
from behind the door, in the darkness of my room
can’t take much more of the impending doom
don’t make a sound hugging dolly tight
holding my breath, staying out of sight
It happens every night
they smoke and drink and start to fight
it’s not the same guy every time
sh makes me call him daddy even though he’s not
they get so loud the neighbors call the cops
then it all gets quiet and I hear the footsteps
dolly and I hide under the bed
I watch for the shadow under the door
the tiny crack between it and the floor
mommy’s asleep and now he wants me
I’ve had too many dreams like these
I wake up screaming but I’m still asleep
the smell of liquor on his breath
as he throws me down on the bed
been doing this to me since I was ten
I wish I had a real dad
one that would tell me stories and make me laugh
he would take dolly and me for walks in the park
push me on the swing and talk until dark
he would be big and strong and brave
and he would chase the monsters away
but daddy didn’t love me enough to stay
that’s what mommy would say
behind the door and I still don’t feel safe
I was an only child and didn’t have any friends
so dolly and I played pretend
we would stay in our room for hours on end
sometimes we would sneak into the kitchen for something to eat
until new daddy caught me, punished me
he said the food was not for ungrateful girls to eat
he locked me in my room for days without food or water
how could a mommy do that to her daughter
dolly and I had a bet
to see how long we could hold our breath
we tied a belt around our neck
the police came and placed daddy under arrest
I guess mommy told them
that I was always a mess
She has a new man now
still lives in the same house
I can hear the voices down the hall
hear the noises in the wall
behind the door, dolly and I play pretend
still listening for the footsteps
hiding under the bed
